Can you hear me now?

One of the few beautiful things about leaving the US was telling Verizon and their crappy overpriced services to stuff it. It was a painful process that involved multiple phone calls, some tears of frustration, possibly some expletives and occasionally yelling things like "I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK HERE CAN BE THIS STUPID." But finally, it was over- we were free. Or so we thought.

This month, after not having Verizon cell phones or cable for over a month (woo hoo!), we both received bills. Impossible you say! Impossible! But no, those thirsty vicious bloodsuckers figured out malicious ways to continue to rob us of our hard earned money even after we left the country. (Now this is NOT unlike the US Federal Government- but that is my next post). So the theme of tonight has been "Let's Skype Verizon Night."

Its gone something like this:

Erin: I live in Singapore, I cancelled my phone in March.
Verizon Rep 1: Says here ya owe us 300 dollars.
Erin: That would be difficult considering I dropped your service over a month ago.
Verizon Rep 1: Why did you do that?
Erin: You missed the part about moving to Singapore?

David: We live in Singapore
Verizon Rep 2: Can you spell that?

David is now engaged in a battle to the death with Verizon Fios. The current stats are as follows:

Number of minutes on call: 45.34 and counting
Number of Transfers: at least 5
Number of times forced to listen to hold music: 15
Number of Times he has given our account number: 1000
Number of Verizon employees it takes to screw in a light bulb: Unknown, must be over 500
Number of humans of normal intelligence spoken to: Still waiting for the first.

And the war rages on...


UPDATE


After a total of 1:06:35 on the phone with Fios- Dave successfully got all fees waived. All hail the victor!